Love Me . Love Me Not .
Friday, May 27, 2005
had a nice day at work today.. bought home 2 large choc chip cookie frm e shop.. nice...but very addictive.. i already ate 2 choc in e morning! one macadamia white n a hazelnut milk.. hmmmmmm... haha.. suddenly asked me work 7am tmr.. but i wanna sleep more!! nevermind..get to go home early mah...... ;)
...2 days ago.. i saw someone... suddenly i had all those memories coming back to me.. bad memories tat i had long forgotten.. lucky thing was he didnt see me.. i didnt wan him to see me. yea, i forgive, but i dun forget. tis guy broke my heart 3 years ago... he was e last guy before my present.. tis guy "taught" me never to trust guys. well, ever since i hav never trusted a single guy.. thus i never made good guy frenz.. i guess other than my grandpa, dad n bf, all other guys juz sux to me.. guys=heartbreakers (for me).. not in a romantic way, but even as a fren, they can be real heartbrekers.. probably cos in a way im a dependent, emotional n sensitive gal. even as a fren, i hope they r good guys. well, if rite now im ever a fren to any guy out there, then tat guy muz be a nice guy.. fren meaning, i call them frenz. call me odd, call me weird, watever.. even if i wan to, its difficult to change my mindset anymore.. well, after going such a huge round.. wat i was saying was... tis guy two-timed me, reason being tat gal would do "things" for him tat i would never ever do. n if i wanna be e only gal, i hav to do "things" for him too. well... bastard. ever since e day i found out, i never spoke to him again. no matter how he begged me like a pathetic freak, i was cold towards him, i treated him like dung. tat was also e day i learnt how to treat ppl badly when they rnt nice to me.. how cruel of me... well, i juz dun sympathise with anyone anymore.. tats why... only ppl who noe me well enough would noe... i dun have frenz... wat i hav rite now in my life r family, my darling, great pals, colleagues, classmates (ppl i care about...) & "outcast"(ppl whom i do not recognise any relation to). sounds like a very cold person? well, old frenz i still keep. true frenz, i keep too.. good friends, juz a few, definitely keep. im still a sentimental person after all.. juz a guys-hater.. dun get me wrong. it wasnt juz abt tis incident. it took many many wrong choices to get me to tis point.. tis was juz e last straw... cant blame me.. i was juz 17, naive n gullible. was...until i met my darling.. so sincere, caring, faithful, understanding, patient.. his sincerity was wat touched me then n brought us together.. until today, i still feel e same (if not more) abt him... loveee him soo much. coming 2 yrs 9 mths... sounds like short time..? well, e road ahead is still a long way... =) ok, still doing my project rite now... better hurry up... cos i wanna zZzz le... ;P
*made my wish*<3
9:49 PM
