Love Me . Love Me Not .
Sunday, January 23, 2005
went out with him today. well, things r better. but i still feel kinda..arghh..watever. we went for a haircut together, then to orchard to continue our cny shopping. think im spending nearly all of my allowance on it. haha.. i dont wanna work on 2nd n 3rd day of cny!! hopefully... i received a "mystery" call tis morning, at abt 1.30am!! called my hp twice n my house once.. i thought who.. so irritated.. so i called back.. turn out to be 'mil nivlek'!! oh my gosh.. its been like 5 years n i juz cant get him outta my life..! racking up e past each time he calls.. honestly, at tat point in time, i had already forgotten his voice n wat i had to do with him....until he repeated e story to me all over again.. tat reminds me.. he dumped me at suntec city all alone, juz to watch tat A1 concert all by himself!! wat kinda "bf" is tat? ok, we r not even considered tat.. not to me... i mean.. at tat age, i didnt noe wat a rship was all abt.. nah, watever.. anyway, next mth is his 20th bday, n he is inviting me to his bday party at a chalet.. but its like...weird! i havent seen him for 4 years n i do not wish to anyway.. not cos of our weird rship, but cos of wat happened 4 years ago.. he was really bad to me. *secret: i used to keep a diary* so how can i forget all tat has happened in my life since i was 13. i stopped writing after i was together with my darling.. so events before tat, all recorded. lol.. scary? well.. things seem to happen so fast when i was 15 to 17. n all of a sudden, im 19 already.. tis yr 20! which means i hav been together with him for almost 2.5 years. for these past 2.5 yrs, e only other guy i went out with is 'd' n only once! n he brought me to meet 'd' cos he wanted to see who i was going out with. so i guess he kinda freaked out too cos we went out till too late n... so, my last good guy friend was gone juz like tat.. oh, not yet.. "..." kinda pathetic actually.. not tat i need a gd guyfriend. i let things be. wat i mean is, he will never understand its ok to hav good guyfriends. tis is kinda unhealthy for our rship if each other is all we hav? i dunno... maybe someday i will noe... =)
*made my wish*<3
11:10 PM
